Tequila Twilight (or: T.Edlet needs to lose a few!)

What a week this has been, ladies. Let me just get you right into it.

"Edlet. I think I'm gaining weight."
"Dude. We are action figures. We don't gain weight."
"Whatever, I'm tons o' fun now. I need to look good for Forks."

"Just look at me. Maybe I should order P90x."
"You are delusional."

"WhatEV, dude. Are you going to help me or not? Those babes in Forks need to see the gun show."
"Alright, fine. I'll help you. Lay down."
"Dude. NOT into that."
"Shut up and lay down."

"Alright, from there, you'll want to sit up, but just from your waist. Don't move your legs. I'll spot you."

"Gaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh."

"Again!"

"Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck your face! This is awful! I quit!"

"Wait... I have an idea..."

"I'll go on a diet!"

Luckily for T.Edlet, I have just the thing for Thirsty Thursday. If you, like me (and T.Edlet and Mox), are trying to lose a few pounds, let me let you in on a little secret: it's the mixer that matters. Of course, light beer is always an option (110-149 calories per 12 oz, except shitty MGD, of course, which is, like, 64 or something), and white wine usually ranks about 75-105 calories. Today we are drinking tequila. The Tequila Twilight weighs in at a whopping 213 calories. At least, it does with diet juice. :)

By using diet mixers, we save calories!


Here, the 'lets present our ingredients. As per usual, I don't have grape juice, but I DO have white grape juice: good enough!

"See, this is only 5 calories per 8 oz! It's amazing! Of course, it tastes like shit, but when you're on a diet, that's what happens."

(In case you didn't believe me.)

Fill the glass 1/3 full with tequila.
(This is where all the calories come from.)

Fill with cranberry juice (leaving room for the grape juice shot)

One shot grape juice

Cheers!!

Hmmm... this tastes like tequila. It actually tastes like sweet tequila, which is weird... It's sweet at first, with no real flavor, and the aftertaste leaves you with just tequila-flavor. Odd. But getting the job done, let me tell you. Boo-zy.

Meh.
"Meh."
"Meh."

For other low-cal drinks, go here or here or here. What's your beat-the-bulge secret? I don't have one, and am interested in hearing any and all you might have. I love junk food and booze an hate exercising. I have zero self-control and was blessed with a lovely, quick metabolism until about 2 years ago.

The first thing you lose on a diet is your sense of humor. ~Author Unknown

As with food, drink, and delicious things... I couldn't pick just one quote:

When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. ~Woody Allen

It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it. ~Roseanne Barr

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is fourteen days. ~Totie Fields

When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad. ~Janette Barber

If I can't have too many truffles I'll do without. ~Colette

I bought a talking refrigerator that said "Oink" every time I opened the door. It made me hungry for pork chops. ~Marie Mott

And for my bloggy bestie:
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. ~Jean Kerr, "Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall," The Snake Has All the Lines, 1958

MWAH!